When my mother became one of my ancestors, I was only eighteen years old. I felt as if the ground beneath me had disappeared. I didn’t have the language then that I have now. The world felt suddenly vast, cold, and profoundly quiet. But looking back, I can see that there were moments when something inside me kept guiding me forward even when I felt lost.
I now understand those moments as my Ori speaking. Not loudly. Not dramatically. But consistently.
In Yoruba cosmology, the Ori is your spiritual head, your divine destiny, and your personal intuition all wrapped into one. It is the compass that was placed inside you before you took your very first breath.
When we experience profound loss, cultural disconnection, or the heavy weight of generational trauma, it is easy to believe we are walking entirely alone. We look outside ourselves for answers, searching for anchors in a world that often demands Black women and elders carry their burdens in silence.
True healing does not begin by looking outward. It begins by listening inward to the sacred melody of your own lineage.
Phase One: The Remembering
To understand where we are going, we must first look at where we have been. Many of the women who come to my sanctuary, Fematin958 Intl, arrive feeling deeply disconnected. They carry an unnameable heavy burden, a sense of grief or anxiety that does not seem to belong to their personal lived experiences alone.
This is the reality of intergenerational trauma. It is the unspoken sorrow of our mothers, the hidden fears of our grandmothers, and the displaced identities of our ancestors who were forced to adapt to systems that did not see their divinity.
When we enter the phase of The Remembering, we begin to acknowledge these patterns. We stop running from the pain and instead sit with it, bringing it into the light.
- Acknowledge the invisible inheritance: We inherit more than just the shape of our eyes or the texture of our hair. We inherit emotional blueprints. Recognizing this is the first step toward freedom.
- Create space for the silence: The modern world is noisy, designed to distract us from our inner world. Dedicated quiet time allows the Ori to be heard.
- Honor the transition: Just as I had to reframe the loss of my mother from a tragic end to a sacred transition into ancestry, we must learn to see our challenges as invitations to grow deeper roots.
Remembering is not always comfortable. It requires us to look at the fractures in our family trees and the gaps in our cultural knowledge. Yet, it is within these very cracks that the seeds of ancestral wisdom begin to sprout.
Phase Two: The Unveiling
Once we begin to remember, we move naturally into The Unveiling. This is the stage where we strip away the layers of conditioning, the societal expectations, and the survival mechanisms that no longer serve us.
For a long time after my mother passed, I wore a mask of strength. I thought that being strong meant being unshakeable, never showing vulnerability, and constantly doing things for others at the expense of my own spirit. Many spiritually-curious individuals and Black women fall into this trap. We become the pillars of our communities while our own internal temples are crumbling.
The Unveiling asks us to drop the mask. Through storytelling, sacred rituals, and spiritual mentorship, we begin to peel back the layers of who the world told us to be so we can discover who we truly are.
During this phase, we learn to distinguish between two distinct voices: the voice of our ego, which is driven by fear and past hurt, and the voice of our Ori, which speaks from a place of divine truth and calm authority.
Cultivating the Connection
To help you ground this practice in your daily life, consider these simple yet profound ways to connect with your spiritual head:
- Morning Alignment: Before you look at your phone or speak to anyone else in the morning, place your hands gently on your head. Breathe deeply and acknowledge your Ori. Offer words of gratitude for your life and ask for clarity throughout the day.
- Ancestral Elevation: Create a small, clean space in your home dedicated to your well and elevated ancestors. A simple glass of fresh water and a white candle can serve as a focal point to honor those who came before you and paved the way.
- Mindful Speech: Pay close attention to the words you speak over your own life. In Yoruba tradition, words carry ase, which is the divine power to make things happen. Speak to yourself with the same compassion and reverence you would offer a beloved elder.
Phase Three: The Reclaiming
The final movement in this sacred dance is The Reclaiming. This is where transformation takes root and manifests in your daily life. It is the moment you step fully into your personal power, your spiritual purpose, and your role as a conscious ancestor in training.
When you reclaim your ancestral wisdom, you are no longer buffeted around by the storms of life. You realize that the ground beneath you did not disappear when you experienced hardship; rather, your roots simply had to grow deeper to find the ancient waters of your lineage. You begin to live with grace, clarity, and an unshakeable sense of belonging.
Reclaiming means rewriting the narrative of your family line. If your ancestors carried poverty, you reclaim abundance. If they carried silence, you reclaim your voice. If they carried fragmentation, you reclaim wholeness. You become the living bridge between the wisdom of the past and the promise of the future.
This work is not just for you. It is for the children who will inherit your name, the communities that look to you for guidance, and the ancestors who stand behind you, cheering you on with every step you take toward your own healing.
A Sacred Invitation to Your True Self
If you are reading this and feeling a stir in your spirit, that is your Ori responding. It is a gentle reminder that you do not have to navigate your grief, your transitions, or your spiritual awakening in isolation. You deserve a sanctuary where your stories are valued, your heritage is celebrated, and your soul is nurtured.
The patterns of the past do not have to dictate the direction of your future. The moments of feeling lost are often just the prelude to being deeply, authentically found. Let us walk this path of remembrance and reclamation together, turning your heaviest challenges into the fuel for your divine purpose.
Book a 15-minute free Call with me – Learn to recognize and transform the negative patterns that may be holding you back and use them for your good. https://gloriaogunbadejo.com/15-minutes-call/.
